If this past summer showed us one thing, it’s that comic books are all the rage now in Hollywood. Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Hellboy, Batman, and Hancock were all major box-office splashes, and there are plenty more to come. But what about those poor films that blazed the trail for these hits, but were forgotten along the way? Granted, most of them probably deserve to be forgotten based on quality alone. But, for the sake of historical research, let’s take a look at a few of these movies that helped to create a world in which super heros are actually cool.

Steel

It may seem tough forget a movie starring the 7″ tall Shaquille O’Neal, but not for anyone who actually saw Steel. Or pretty much any movie starring Shaq. O’Neal plays the titular DC Comics hero, a former military weapons designer who takes his creations out on the street to fight crime. Shockingly, the film was a box-office disaster, making about 1/16 of what it cost to make. But Shaq fans everywhere should take note that none of the casting for the upcoming JLA movie has been made official, so he may yet reprise his role.

Mystery Men

As opposed to more serious material like Steel, this film takes a look at the lighter side of super-heroism. Ben Stiller, William H. Macy, and Hank Azaria star as a trio of super heros with some of the greatest super powers yet imagined. Stiller is Mr. Furious, a man who gets, well, angry a lot. Macy is The Shoveler, a hero who takes his name from his favorite weapon, meanwhile Azaria is the Blue Raja: a Brit with a knack for tossing around cutlery. Except, of course, for knives. Other notable entries in the super-hero world include The Spleen, The Bowler, and Invisible Boy, who can not be seen when no one is looking at him.

The Punisher

No, no, not that The Punisher. 15 years before Thomas Jane portrayed the maskless vigilante in 2004, Dolph Lundgren was cleaning up the streets as Frank Castle. For some reason, the team behind the movie decided to change most of The Punisher’s back story. I mean, he didn’t even wear a skull on his shirt! Now that’s not right. But what the 1989 version does have is ninjas. Yes, ninjas. In addition to taking down the regular mafia, Castle also makes it his mission to stop the Japanese Yakuza from setting up shop in America. This of course leads to plenty of thrown ninja stars, but not quite enough to save this movie.

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Andrew Webster is a freelance writer based in Toronto who covers comics, movies, videogames, and anything else that will rot out your brain. Check out his personal site to read more of his incoherent ramblings.

This entry was posted on Thursday, September 25th, 2008 at 12:00 am and is filed under Tales From The Basement. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.